Constant Change

To dad. With love

Odette Bester — Mon, 04 Jul 2011 13:51:46 +0000

Absence – the sound that stings the ears, the heart can’t bear to hear, the tears can not negate, the fear will resonate, no-one can dissipate, the word I’ve come to hate.

To dad. With love

I just don’t think I’ll ever get over you

Odette Bester — Mon, 13 Jun 2011 20:04:27 +0000

My life would be rather dull without music and poetry, so I’ve decided that I should set new objectives for my blog and write about the things that push me off my chair rather than let me slouch in it. There is something about poetry that gives breath to my soul, it stirs something within me and intrigues me the way it manages to hold both mystery and madness together. Music isn’t far off along this path either, one of my favourite pass times is to scout out new music that is a little off the beaten track. The type I’m talking about is generally frowned upon by those I try to share it with or force it on; nonetheless it’s the kind of music that makes my feet tap under the table or leaves me wanting to take road trips to nowhere in particular.

I’m attempting to combine these two things because I think they compliment one another so well and often listening to a certain song while reading a particular poem helps one understand the experience behind the words. As Johann Wolfgang Van Goete once said, ‘…a man should hear a little music, read a little poetry, and see a fine picture every day of his life in order that worldly cares may not obliterate the sense of the beautiful which God has implanted in the human soul.’

The added bonus is that I feel I get to teach those, who might read this blog, what real music is or at least what I think real music is. So first on my list is a song by Colin Hay live at the Northcote social club called I just don’t think I’ll ever get over you.

YOU LINGER TOO LONG

I wish I could own my thoughts
To turn them away from you.
No memories, no photographs,
no talk or acknowledgment will do.

Maybe then the dense fog of heavy heartedness will lift
And call again for the pleasant peace of silliness.

I wish you would be less destructive with my emotions
the haunting of your voice is too much for my devotion

The intrusion of your presence,
in the things you’ve left behind,
makes me seek the absence of your stare
and any other reference.

Why won’t you stand far away,
so I don’t have to be dismayed
with the emptiness you can never mend
and the good-bye you never said.

You linger too long for my heart to move on.

You make beautiful things

Odette Bester — Thu, 07 Apr 2011 22:09:50 +0000

All this pain
I wonder if I’ll ever find my way
I wonder if my life could really change at all
All this earth
Could all that is lost ever be found
Could a garden come up from this ground at all

You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us

All around
Hope is springing up from this old ground
Out of chaos life is being found in You

You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us

You make me new, You are making me new
You make me new, You are making me new

You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us

Careful

Odette Bester — Thu, 07 Apr 2011 00:00:51 +0000

It’s the little things
They pulled me in and I’m defenceless
I try to ignore like I’ve done before but it’s just useless

I’ve made up my mind that I’m gonna let you in
And I’m not afraid but I have to say

This is gonna hurt if it ever ends
But somehow you out shattered my defence
This is gonna hurt if it ever starts
So promise you’ll be careful with my heart

It’s the things you do
They made me fall hard for you and I can’t help it
And it’s every day that I feel this way
So just don’t stop it

I’ve made up my mind that I’m gonna let you in
And I’m not afraid but I have to say

This is gonna hurt if it ever ends
But somehow you out shattered my defence
This is gonna hurt if it ever starts
So promise you’ll be careful with my heart

I won’t make excuses
They just all seem useless
You don’t have the time
I guess I’ll take my chances now that I know love is on the line

This is gonna hurt if it ever ends
But somehow you out shattered my defence
This is gonna hurt if it ever starts
So promise you’ll be careful with my heart

Michelle Featherstone -Careful

If God was a musician I think this would be his style

Odette Bester — Sun, 13 Mar 2011 22:29:19 +0000

Sometimes I take my mind for long walks and let it wonder but often the results that I come up with are an array of strange and colourful things that I write down but don’t often share. Why? Well because to be honest my thinking is sometimes off the wall and many people will think, as a friend of mine would say, “that I’m out to lunch” aka. standing a little bit too close to crazy.

So I’m taking a bit of a chance and sharing some of my crazy.

I was listening to Joshua Radin tonight and fumbled across the You Tube video to his song “You got what I need.” Now before I explain why I am pointing this out I need to explain that I have often wondered…If God were a musician what style or genre of music would he enjoy and what would his music sound like?

I can’t imagine God would be in the church band all clean shaven and looking neat, I do however envision him being a pretty neat musician, rugged looking with a different but very distinct and smooth voice. He would probably play the guitar very sweetly and would play in places like bars and dark grungy pubs filled with cigarette smoke and the smell of beer. He wouldn’t be over the top with his performance but rather very low key and chilled, he’d engage with his audience and he’d probably have a drummer who was so tall that it would look like he was standing when he played.

So this brings me back to Joshua Radin’s song “You got what I need.” I think God would sound like and play this style of music. So I have included the You Tube video below so you get the picture. I’m sure many people will disagree with what I imagine and some will even consider this post irreverent, I’d disagree and think it’s fair game to wonder. I think it’s an interesting thing to think about and wondered what others imagined this to be like.

I could do without my blackberry, or could I?

Odette Bester — Fri, 04 Mar 2011 15:58:01 +0000

I try and give some time to thinking through significant things throughout my day so that I don’t go through a week being as dull as ditch water. And for the most part I have inklings of one or two thought provoking things that I bat around in my head. For the last several months I have been sunk in things like writing, creativity, social media, distractions and creating good, healthy habits. I’m terribly good at developing unhelpful habits that linger around for far too long and cause havoc so I am confessing one and trying to implement good habits in this area.

For a while now I have become part of the “blackberry revolution” taking place mostly in South Africa and a few other key places, with the exception of American because they frown upon anything that does not sport an Apple icon. Since having a blackberry however I have noticed how much of a distraction it can be at work or in company. I have seen people, and I am just as guilty of this, who will answer a BBM, Email, Twitter or Facebook message while you have coffee with them or are in the middle of a conversation or spending time together. It is very disconcerting and I hate it being done to me. I like giving my full attention to something or someone when I am with them and my blackberry just distracts me from that very thing; being able to take a genuine interest in whoever I am with or whatever I am doing. In essence I am robbing that person of their time and indirectly saying that they are not as important as the messages or emails coming through on my phone that I must answer right away. Not only is it rude but it says a lot about what I think of myself, what I think about others and what I think is important. I have almost lost the ability to distinguish between what is important and what is urgent.

I have done some reading and deliberating about what I can do to prevent this bad habit from running amok in my life. Some reading and opinions from other bloggers have helped me decide that when it comes to spending time with someone, anyone that I have committed that time to, then I need to be present. So whether that means my phone needs to be on silent or off, if that little red flashing light is too much of a temptation to pick it up, I suppose the same goes when working or doing something important. Chances are I’ll get more done and be more productive when I’m not answering messages every 20 minutes or updating status’.

So I have decided along with the above mentioned; though work-wise it is impossible to have my phone off for the full 8 hours, it would be helpful to have it off every morning for the first few hours of the day so that I can get my mind focused on what needs to be done and so that I can set the tone for the rest of the day. And once I’ve attended to the work that needs to be done that day then I can switch it on and spend a few minutes replying to any messages that have come through or I need to reply to. (Donald Miller – Want to be productive? Turn off your phone)

Bad habits die hard with me but I’m hoping that the changes will bear fruit and encourage me to keep going at it for the sake of creativity, relationships and sanity I suppose.

The best followers

Odette Bester — Tue, 01 Mar 2011 05:20:47 +0000

Since social media has become the new black it has also begun to show the desperate need for people to sport their popularity by the amount of followers or friends they have. Apparently this makes us cool by all standards and elevates us close to celebrity status, it’s like the school playground all over again; 500 followers or more = the cool kids, 499 or less = ag shame. Our generation loves fan-following, it makes us feel important and popular it doesn’t matter that the relationships are a centimeter deep.

What’s more we like to wax lyrical on status updates about where we are, what we are doing and who we are doing it with. Or better yet we make the updates cryptic so that we have people wondering and marveling at our profound thoughts or scatter our walls full of photo’s of what we’ve been doing. I’m not saying any of this is bad I’m just noting that we basically highlight parts of our lives so that they look exciting; not many people tweet about the mundane things because that does very little for the image we are trying to maintain and the identity we are trying to create.

I write about this because I am guilty of it, my immaturity runs deep and is obvious in most social media streams. I get slack in posting on this blog because I think to myself unless I have something profound to say or a I can write about something that will make people have a I wish I had your life moment, or unless I have a large following of readers who think I’m talented then it’s not worth it really. However, yesterday I became aware of something… I’ve had two friends mention in the last while that they have noticed very little activity on my blog but have sifted through some old posts nonetheless and will keep looking out for new posts. They both know I am a useless blogger, my writing leaves much to be desired and I talk a lot of smack most of the time about mundane, often meaningless things, and yet they read my blog and encourage me to write even about the mundane things.

The truth is that in any social media forum I’d rather have two faithful, significant followers like this than 500 or more that make me feel good about myself and help me elevate my status.

The best followers are the ones who aren’t just interested in the highlighted life moments I drape across twitter or facebook, they are the ones who are interested in the mundane too.

I know I’ll fall prey to my pride often and seek recognition from a superficial, inaccurate pictures of what’s important but I’m hoping in those moments I’ll remember these two followers and true friendships are rich and deep and sweeter than 500 or more followers who are only interested when I am interesting.

This sums up how I feel this month

Odette Bester — Wed, 05 Jan 2011 10:26:41 +0000

Summer has officially arrived in Cape Town with a scorching 35 degrees today; so along with words like, beach, sun, surf, friends, braai and cricket, this photo sums up how I’m feeling about its arrival. More of this I say…

Christmas Is for Those Who Hate It Most

Odette Bester — Mon, 20 Dec 2010 02:13:28 +0000

A refreshing, unexpected article about Christmas that is worth a read on the Gospel Coalition Blog. Check out the link here for the full article: Christmas Is for Those who Hate It Most.

Jesus came for those who look in the mirror and see ugliness.

Jesus came for daughters whose fathers never told them they were beautiful.

Christmas is for those who go to “wing night” alone.

Christmas is for those whose lives have been wrecked by cancer, and the thought of another Christmas seems like an impossible dream.

Christmas is for those who would be nothing but lonely if not for social media.

Christmas is for those whose marriages have careened against the retaining wall and are threatening to flip over the edge.

Christmas is for the son whose father keeps giving him hunting gear when he wants art materials.

Christmas is for smokers who cannot quit even in the face of a death sentence.

Christmas is for prostitutes, adulterers, and porn stars who long for love in every wrong place.

Christmas is for college students who are sitting in the midst of the family and already cannot wait to get out for another drink.

Christmas is for those who traffic in failed dreams.

Christmas is for those who have squandered the family name and fortune—they want “home” but cannot imagine a gracious reception.

Christmas is for parents watching their children’s marriage fall into disarray.

Have been seduced by my December Playlist

Odette Bester — Sat, 04 Dec 2010 10:09:05 +0000

Comes and goes in waves – Greg Laswell
Altogether Now – Patrick and Eugene
Big Jump – Emiliana Torrini
Come Out Of The Shade – The Perishers
Falling For You – Seabird
When She’s near – Family Fiction
Only Love Remains – Griffin House
Raindrops from the sun (Hey hey hey) – Imani Coppola
Inside of Love – Nada Surf
Stuck to you – Nikki Costa
No envy, No fear – Joshua Radin
Jungle Drum – Emiliana Torrini
Never bloom again – The perishers
Rise up – Ben Lee
Save you – Matthew Perryman Jones
The Uniform – The Flying Tourbillion Orchestra
Gotta have you – The weepies
Trouble Maker – Weezer
Weighty Ghost – Wintersleep
You always make me smile – Kyle Andrews
White light – Wilco
Save the empty – Erin McCarley
When you come home – Calahan
What a pity – Right Away, Great Captain
Washed by the Water – NeedtoBreath
Turpentine – Brandi Carlile
Gather to the Chapel – Liam Finn
And then you – Greg Laswell
Stay Over – The Rescues